A few years ago, I was the new girl in town—again. Except this time, I had moved back to a place I had called home four years prior. In the fall of 2012, I returned to my college town of Athens, Georgia, after living in Mexico for two years as a missionary teacher. I remember lamenting to a friend of mine about how lonely I was and how I just didn’t think I was going to make any friends. Why was being single the curse that defined my life? Why was I still watching Netflix alone in my bed on Friday nights (and Saturday, too)? She listened for a while, and then asked, “Well, what are you going to do about it?”

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But what if God has called you to where you are for such a time as this? What if He has created you and placed you in your season to love the people within your sphere of influence? What if He has a purpose for your waiting and your longing? We aren’t made to be the best at everything, nor were we made to have Pinterest-worthy homes and pristine lives. We were made to love…

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I don’t know about you, friends, but I often want to know the answers to all of my questions before I obey. But that is rarely, if ever, the way God works. He provides just enough light for each step of the way…

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I don’t know about you, but when I read the Bible, I often see myself in the Israelites. I am quick to want a dramatic rescue from my circumstances. It is difficult for me to be uncomfortable or feel as though I have no sense of control.…

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May I tell you something? Sometimes, the state of my heart is a wreck. In my shame, I want nothing more than to hide. I cannot believe that God would love me even at my lowest. I wonder when I write, ‘What would other people think about me if they found this journal after my death?!’ But we can come to God with our whole selves. We do not have to hide from Him (or from anyone else, for that matter).

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Halloween. It’s like a four-letter word in some Christian circles. Yes, there are some pagan roots that do not line up with the Bible. There are practices this time of year that are downright demonic. But when most people mention that they enjoy celebrating Halloween, they aren’t talking about their love of séances and Ouija boards. They are talking instead about dressing up in silly costumes, carving pumpkins, eating lots of candy, and spending time with neighbors and friends.

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Here is what I know: I am a Black woman, married to a white man, mother of a biracial son and a Hispanic daughter. I have friends with varied skin tones. But the most important part of me is Jesus. He leads me and calls me His own. So if I have a problem, a hurt, or a fear, I take it to Him. When I am burdened by the violence and hate and brutality, I bring it to Him. When I am afraid for my children, He soothes my worries and my pain.

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