Saturday, July 2, 2011

stream of consciousness

Being home has been wonderful. It has been so nice to relax and do nothing. I have read for pleasure. I had the opportunity to go to the beach twice. My family has had some down time together. Many reunions happened with friends, and lots of hugs have been given and received. Life has been pretty sweet.

Coming back to Mexico this time is going to be bittersweet. I have really been enjoying my time at home, because there are some things I miss about being home, such as running and the lush green landscape of the Southeast. I am ready for the opportunity to be a part of ministry that I have wanted to be a part of all school year at the brickyard. It will be wonderful to not set an alarm for 6:00 AM. Having my own space will be nice, and getting to know some friends better will be good, too. But to have been home for such a long time and then to go back to Chihuahua again will be difficult. I know that there is nothing for me in East Cobb. The Lord has not called me there, and I am completely fine with that fact. But on the other hand, I do miss the comfort and familiarity of home. Things in Chihuahua have become familiar and are like the new norm. Not much surprises me and gives me complete culture shock anymore. My church family is unique. My friends are sweet. My house is quaint. My dog is...crazy. But I love my life there.

In this new season, I am hoping that the Lord teaches me something new about Himself. I hope that I come to depend on Him in a way unlike any other season in my life. Isaiah 43:19 has been on my heart and mind for the past few months. It says, "Behold, I am doing a new thing. Now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and streams in the desert." The Lord is definitely doing a new thing in my heart. He has already begun to plant new dreams and desires in my heart for whatever comes after Mexico, which is exciting but nervewracking, too.

Although I have one year left, I do not want to hold back just because I know I will have to say goodbye sooner rather than later. I want to do the best that I can and put forth excellence in my work for my kids and also because everything I do should be for the glory of God and no one else. I want to truly love my neighbors and the colleagues with whom I am blessed to work. I want to take chances, and I want to make lots of memories. After all, we have all only been given this one life to live, right?

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